As women, society conditions us from a young age to care about our appearance. But not too much, or we become vain. Take care of ourselves, but not more than we do other people, or we become selfish. To dress nicely, but not boast. To dress professionally or risk being perceived as immature or inadequate.

Early on in my career, I discovered that the women I looked up to showed up to work looking polished and presented themselves confidently. And I realized that my outward appearance influences how others perceive and treat me. Small changes snowballed, and soon, the women around me started shifting as well.

Clothing is essential in everyday life. Yet, we rarely realize the impact it makes on how we feel and how we treat ourselves. Here’s why caring for your appearance and style is a radical act of self-love.

Style as a Means of Self-discovery

Many clients come to me at a pivotal point in their lives. They’ve gone through a breakup, a career shift, or a big move and feel lost or out of touch with themselves. They don’t recognize what they see in the mirror — or don’t know how to dress their new body.

More often, their wardrobes are filled with items they found at a sale, garments from years back, or the same old T-shirts they’ve held on to since college. You may be able to relate. After all, it feels indulgent to go on a shopping spree — who has the time? But this type of uninspired, improvised wardrobe leads to feeling frustrated every time you need to get dressed, stirring those feelings of “I have nothing to wear.”

Instead, getting to know yourself, your likes and dislikes, and your body is essential for developing a style that feels authentic and boosts your confidence. And when you feel confident, you show up authentically.

Embracing Your Uniqueness

When you follow fashion, you’re constantly chasing the next new thing. There’s nothing wrong with enjoying fashion. It’s fun and exciting, and it feels special. But the core difference between fashion and style is that fashion is everywhere; your style is as unique as you are.

Your wardrobe should work for every facet of your life — from work to personal to family life. Dressing for yourself removes the emphasis on external approval and encourages you to choose pieces that feel good.

Once you embrace your it factor, you will develop the skill of including fashionable elements into your style without becoming a fashion victim or filling your closet with countless fast-fashion items you’ll wear maybe once.

Releasing Judgment and Dressing for Your Present Self

A common trap for many women is waiting for something to change before finding their style. That could be your next promotion, those pesky pounds you’ve been trying to lose, or that sun-kissed look you dream of achieving on your next vacation.

We’re our hardest critics. The next time you’re criticizing your image in the mirror, consider this: Would you say these things out loud to your best friend? How would she react? If the answers are no, or she’d be hurt, why are you telling yourself these things?

We tend to use clothing as a reward or punishment. We buy something new when we hit a goal weight or manage to change something we dislike. How about we release that mentality and use style to play and enjoy?

The perfect time or body doesn’t exist. There is no time like today to take care of yourself. Choosing garments that flatter your body, regardless of size or shape, will instantly make you feel better. Similarly, choosing versatile pieces that adapt to your current life (rather than holding on to an old version of yourself) will help you embrace the present and nurture your relationship with yourself.

Expressing Yourself Through Your Clothes

Have you noticed your moods impact your choice when getting dressed? Your outer appearance is a reflection of your internal state. And the same can be reversed: If you feel confident about your appearance, you feel more at ease in most situations.

In addition, your sense of style speaks volumes about your personality before you say a word. Just think about iconic figures like Coco Chanel or Princess Diana, and you’ll easily see their essence shining through in every photo.

I recommend having a few go-to outfits or pieces you know will boost your confidence. This way, the next time you have a board meeting or dinner party and want to look sharp, there’s something perfect waiting for you. A capsule wardrobe is your shortcut to a polished look, every time.

You Deserve To Look and Feel Your Best

We often treat fashion and style as indulgences or vanity. We’re conditioned to think that shopping or focusing on appearance makes us shallow. But whether we like it or not, our outward appearance impacts the impressions we make and how others treat us.

Developing your sense of style helps you feel your best and is a valuable investment in yourself. Just like you wouldn’t question buying high-quality furniture or glassware, why would you question buying a gorgeous pair of shoes?

Embracing your style and presenting yourself authentically is a powerful act of self-love. Schedule a consultation with me and let’s explore this side of your personality so that you can show up feeling your best, no matter what.